We develop emotional habits by reacting to events in childhood. We bring our emotional habits to relationships, by unconsciously acting them out with partners through need-seeking, avoidance tactics and/or expectations, etc. When we heal our trauma we become more capable of bringing conscious awareness to our habits, showing up more authentically, abiding in the adult self and thereby having more successful adult relationships.
EMDR, which stands for Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing, is a method for healing trauma. It involves allowing the body to process trauma by directing attention to a specific memory while stimulating both lobes of the brain. Why do we need this bilateral simulation? When we do talk therapy we engage the left brain. We talk about what’s happening and we develop understanding. However, if we have trauma or wounding in the system, it is the right brain that holds the emotional charge. The bilateral stimulation allows one to develop understanding of the trauma while also releasing the emotional charge in the body, thereby developing a new neuro-pathway.
In my practice, I also use EMDR to heal attachment wounding. I call this work Building A Secure Base. This is how EMDR and relationship work go hand in hand.
Please feel free to reach out to me for more information on EMDR.