I specialize in relationships and trauma.
I started out years ago as a relationship therapist and over time have learned that most issues in relationship stem from past trauma or unprocessed hurt that have created self protective mechanisms and patterns that get in the way of healthy relating. This is how relationship and trauma go hand in hand. What I do is help people identify what is getting activated in themselves in their relationship that causes them to act or react in a particular way. I invite the client or in a couple, both clients to take ownership for what we bring to the table. There's no benefit in blaming our partner, even though that's the common habit. Real transformation comes from owning what we do. Blaming the partner keeps us a victim. Victims don't have the power to change. A lot of the work is opening to taking ownership of how we show up. Ownership leads to having power to change. It feels good to be empowered. Once we have awareness of our reaction we can work on changing the pattern. Sometimes the patterns are more entrenched due to trauma or layers of trauma, or hurt or layers of hurt that needs healing.
I work with:
- Relationships, Marriage & Dating
- Developing Confidence & Addressing What Gets in the Way of That
- Couples Counseling
- Online Counseling
- EMDR for Healing Trauma & Past Hurt
- Anxiety & Panic Attacks
- Grief & Loss Counseling
- Work & Career issues
- Animal Assisted Therapy & Emotional Support Animal Documentation (for those in need as part of their treatment plan)
Depression happens when people are met with difficult or painful feelings that they don't know how to be with or give space to. I help people learn how to be with their feelings so that they feel better. Feelings are like waves in the ocean. They want to just move through. If we block them through various avoidance patterning we will become depressed because the feeling has nowhere to go. It bogs us down. Once we learn how to give space to the feelings they move through and we find ourselves feeling free and open. It sounds siimple and it actually is. Our patterning makes Being more complicated than it needs to be.
Anxiety and Panic Attacks often stem from repetitive thinking patterns that take us away from the present moment, bringing us into a fantasy "terrible" or "disastrous" future. Once we recognize that we are caught in a thinking pattern, we can practice cognitive behavioral techniques to unhook us from the mind-movie into the present. When we connect with the present we find peace.
I have worked with a wide range of emotional and behavioral issues, relationships, trauma, you name it. The main gyst of my work is helping people develop awareness so that they can be more present and not have to resort to unconscious abiding.
I am trained in EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing) - a technique that helps people process trauma. I use it for trauma, and also, as a way of re-parenting clients who didn't get what they needed from their parents so that can heal attachment wounding. I don't spend time blaming parents. I understand that people do the best they can. Unless there's mential illness, people don't want to hurt their kids. But sometimes if a parent didn't get what they needed from their own parents they will be unable to give fully to their kids. This is how patterning gets transferred down through the generations. Even if our parent was abusive it's our work to deal with now. Most often relationship issues stem from one or both partner's in the couple trying to get their parental needs met through their partner, creating co-dependency. This is how the re-parenting technique is helpful. It serves to help the client heal their attachment wounding so that they may show up as a grounded, present, autonomous adult available to be a partner in a relationship. When we are able to meet our own unmet needs that come up in relationship, like when we inevitabily get triggered, we are not needy toward our partner but instead grounded in ourselves in a healthy way.
I also use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - tools to help identify and transform negative thinking, Family Systems Therapy - a process of understanding internalized roles and habits derived from your family of origin, and Gestalt Therapy - practices that invite you into the here and now and away from the past or future thinking.
What I have witnessed people achieve in therapy with me is so vast and inspiring.
Be Happier and Feel Contentment,
Get Out of Your Own Way,
Manage Stress and Reduce Anxiety,
Move Through Depression,
Improve Communication Skills,
Develop Greater Self Awareness,
Work Through Resentments, Anger and Grievances,
Identify and Change Unhealthy Behavioral Patterns,
Become Aware of and Change Negative Thoughts About Yourself,
Manage Feelings and Reactivity with Greater Ease,
Have Healthier Relationships,
Work More Effectively,
Have Compassion, Acceptance and Love for Yourself and Others,
Heal Past Hurts,
...the list goes on...